AimHi Publishing - About Body Language

About Body Language continued...

Just as we learn these things during childhood and adolescence, so too we learn subconsciously how to stand or sit when we are tired, excited, bored, lonely, frustrated or interested. So too do we learn what to do with our entire body when we feel threatened, intimidated, frightened or shocked, embarrassed, hysterical, excited, amazed and, yes, in love too.

A conscious awareness and understanding of body language is an important skill in effective communication. It plays a major role in developing confidence, assertiveness and leadership as well as many other personal and professionally related qualities, because when our body contradicts our words questions are always posed in the minds of others about either our motives (honesty) or our feelings (confidence), because 'something' appears to be inconsistent or 'not right'.

Perhaps the single most common challenge in people's analysis or perceptions about body language is their fixation with relatively insignificant gestures like folded arms and crossed legs etc. When read on their own they mean little or nothing at all because people do these under almost any set of circumstances and not only when they are putting up barriers to us. When reading another person's body gestures it is important to consider their whole body or what are called clusters of gestures and not just one off or isolated movements.

The science of NLP provides an interesting solution to this common misunderstanding by proposing a simple and yet highly effective answer in the form of matching and mirroring. Originally intended as a specific tool for gaining and maintaining rapport the process can provide a first hand experience of what another person is feeling

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